She//Her//You

 She has trust issues because she has been lied a couple of times. 

She sometimes questions your intentions because she has been cheated on before. 

She sometimes pushes you away because she wants to know how far can you deal with her. 

She is impatient sometimes because she is so sick of promises. 

She is dramatic and has mood swings because she got to deal with her hormones. 

She knows that she is acting too much sometimes, but she also regrets that. 

She only wants a little more patience from you. She hopes it is not too much to ask.

written by: Neil Jed Castro

My last post on 2016, i think. Its been a while since i forgot i got this blog. Since Google reminded me thru email, so I’ve decided to walk in my blog site. And yeah i manage to log in. Well done.

I got no topic for today as I’m working while figuring out why my life is so miserable lately. Oh yah, am working now. I’ve graduated last year. Last year of me being a university  student.

Well, gonna catch up with this blog later. I got a good topic to speak out. See you soon. 🤗

Comparison. 

One word that might change someone/something. We can take comparison as a good paradigm to improve our self, but also it can bring our soul to the deepest heart-cracked situation. We can compare other people with us, and set our mind to be the best, not like them or in their way, but in our own way. Sometimes, others are comparing us to other people too. Cannot deny it, right? Especially for teens and students. Hahaha alwayssssss being compared by their parents. Yeah. Parents can compare their children but in a good way. Don't simply like 'your cuzzy iz bettah than yuhhh' or 'this ah boy can do this, yuh cannot aa' or 'why yuh cant be like this child' and so on. Half of this, we, as teens can digest it. Some, are way no. Its kinda mental-scratching and may be a trigger to disappointment or like they never being appreciated. Well, teens are hard to understand. Their emotion can be high, and can be in the lowest point. Nahhh, back to our topic. Comparison. If this thing do in correct way, yes, you already save a person's emotion from drowning. But please, don't compare too much because every single person in this earth has their own capabilities and talent. Who knows they can conquer this entire universe by typing on the keyboard? 

Dark elixir.

Guess that someone has drinking up a tons of dark elixir. That spell has concealing their heart with hatred and dumbness. You know why? Because they can't think wisely. They keep following their emotion or somewhat we can call their ass. Emotion are created from our heart. If there's no dirt scattered on our heart, or maybe a little, it might be easy to control that EMOTION thing. I've conclude that to erase the dirt you have to sacrifice a lot. You have to CHANGE. CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE. CHANGE YOUR PERCEPTION (the way you think). 

Somehow, transformation can be hard too. Still, what i can say is, its depends on our self. Just like a torchlight. If you got a good battery, it will shine brighter and vice versa. Positive attitude should be implemented. 

If hatred seeds has been dig into your soil of heart, please, dig it up and throw it away. Its no good at all. This factor can lead to separation and crashing the relationship that you have built or preserved for a long time. Flashback to the old times. How we loved each other, how we helped each other. 

Yeap. Dark elixir are everywhere. In many forms. In many shape. In many ways it can camouflage itself and you might get a sip of it, so be careful. People nowadays constantly want to drag each other down until to the center of the earth, so they might be powerful. 

Stay away from dark elixir, but stay inside our God's love. 

best regards,

Suziey.

Nowadays, for me, good friends are hard (extremely hard) to find. Whoever can stand by your side by thick and thin, don't lose them. But people seems to take advantages over other people. That is why we can't being sooooo nice to anyone. They might stab you with a katana from the back. Dude, friends like that for me is not worth it to cry for, to mourn for and to be with.

These kinda people usually be nice to us when need something or need our help. (BAM! YOU'RE NOT DESERVED TO BE HELPED BY ME! BUT BECAUSE I'M TOO NICE SO YEAH). These fellow friends will forget about you once they happy, or got other friends.

Anyone here got some friends like what i've mention above, you may slowly scrap their name and 'BEST FRIEND' title from your heart. Then, throw it into the hell. Don't treat anyone so nice until you get hurt because of them. Wasting of your time.

Go along with someone or anyone who deserved to be your friends.

I missed you. Did you feel the same?

When missing you,
I'll let your voice sing for me,
Your fingers strumming the guitar,
In a virtual way.

-Suziey E.,2015-

No one can't drag you down.

Greetings everyone. So tonight, I'll babbling about self confidence. Why this topic? Because some of my friends asked me how in the world i got a very highly intense level of self confidence. How can i confront the crowd on the stage? How? HAHAHA. LOL.

Back to school era, am the one who hardly being shy <assumed by my gang>. (Hey, am shy okey). We got this nasty presentation and my bestie got her nerve out of her back. She asked me, how do control that nervous feeling? Me said.. I donno!

Actually, am just being myself. Just do it and ignore your surrounding.

Back to reality nowadays, am scrolling instagram. Am found a few of hot girls instagram account. Shit they're really hot and beautiful. And their age is 15 years old, i was like HOLY CRAP. They're like 25 something at my first glance. Yeah, then am comparing myself to them. Damn. Am nothing. Like beauty and the beast! I started to wander my thoughts. Am started to feel like am damn ugly. Am started to feel like am wanna be le beau est jolie as them. PAP! I can't.

I can't because i have to be myself. Am was thinking, am good in cooking, baking and some other stuffs, but they're only good in selfies and fashion. Damn it. My point here is, we all have special abilities. Dorang mungkin famous kat insta tapi tak semestinya dorang bagus. Dorang famous sebab cantik, tayang badan and so on.

Aku positifkan diri dengan cakap macam tu. Well, most of the girls nowadays can't cook even potong bawang pun tak reti. Selfie ngan makeup fashion and clubbing pandai. Padahal umur baru nak baligh.
Jangan laa terasa rendah diri hanya sebab kecantikan luaran orang lain. Pandang diri sendiri, baiki diri sendiri.

Kalau berjaya pun kau yang bahagia, kau gagal lak kau susah pastu orang gelakkan.

My post kali ni bersepah. Ini je terbuku dalam hati aku. HAHAHA.

JADILAH DIRI SENDIRI.

DON'T FAKE YOURSELF.